Jemma's Tales
Aging With Style Detours
June 20, 2015
We began the Aging With Style Series back in January, and it has been awhile since I did a post on
this topic. Some things popped into my mind and heart as I was driving back from Oklahoma
yesterday afternoon, after spending a few days with our
youngest daughter and our granddaughter- Molly.
Naturally, I just have to share them with you.
These thoughts popped into my mind as I was forced to take a detour home because of mudslides
along I35 from Oklahoma to Texas.
My altered route took me along 287 - a route which I had never been on, in fact my GPS annoyingly
kept recalculating and wanting me to make U Turns and go back to the familiar route that both of us
knew.
At one point I told my GPS to be quiet, that we couldn't go that way because the highway was closed.
Finally she gave in, and accepted that we had taken a detour and should make the best of it.
Detours-we have all had them, we fight them, they are uncomfortable, unfamiliar, unwanted.
We have to recalculate-our plans, our life, they affect our emotions, our thoughts, our outlook and
our attitude.
As a woman, I am acutely aware that I am aging-a detour that quite frankly has caught me off
guard just a tad-it may be a natural part of life, but I just didn't know our bodies would go in one
direction and our minds and souls go in another!
Seriously, this requires a certain mindset and a game plan.
It is more important to me today than ever to accept graciously the detours in my life and recalculate
wisely, intently, and purposefully in order to live a life with style.
A style which comes from within, from the heart and the spirit- a style that is timeless.
Oh, and when those pesky detours coming knocking at our doors, and they eventually find us all,
It is vital to learn how to manage those emotions, thoughts and anxieties.
To let go of the familiar, the comfortable, the journey which we had so carefully planned
and embark on the new route.
As I look back on my life, and as I look to the future, as I look into the eyes and hearts of my
dearest of dears-my children-and mostly centering in on my daughters.
(Because you do know, that women think, feel and hear different than men.)
I would want my daughters, the ones I gave birth to and those which I lovingly acquired from my
husband I would want them to know this.
Life is filled with detours, many of them hurt-badly.
They make our hearts ache and our heads spin.
Sometimes we want to run, but if we must run, run with intent and Run With Passion.
Emotions and thoughts are part of the process of detours, but recalculate, knowing that
what you are thinking and feeling are just that-they do not define you.
Embrace your Faith, your connection to your Heavenly Father will comfort and guide you.
Seek comfort from those who love you.
Your previous journey has not been a waste, it has been a tool to prepare you for this detour.
Take these tools, add them to your handbook of life, punch the new destination in your
personal GPS of life and truly know that All of this is part of the remarkable journey of living.
Of Aging, at any age, with Style.
If you have a moment, please share how you have managed the detours in your life.
xoxox
this topic. Some things popped into my mind and heart as I was driving back from Oklahoma
yesterday afternoon, after spending a few days with our
youngest daughter and our granddaughter- Molly.
Naturally, I just have to share them with you.
These thoughts popped into my mind as I was forced to take a detour home because of mudslides
along I35 from Oklahoma to Texas.
My altered route took me along 287 - a route which I had never been on, in fact my GPS annoyingly
kept recalculating and wanting me to make U Turns and go back to the familiar route that both of us
knew.
At one point I told my GPS to be quiet, that we couldn't go that way because the highway was closed.
Finally she gave in, and accepted that we had taken a detour and should make the best of it.
Detours-we have all had them, we fight them, they are uncomfortable, unfamiliar, unwanted.
We have to recalculate-our plans, our life, they affect our emotions, our thoughts, our outlook and
our attitude.
As a woman, I am acutely aware that I am aging-a detour that quite frankly has caught me off
guard just a tad-it may be a natural part of life, but I just didn't know our bodies would go in one
direction and our minds and souls go in another!
Seriously, this requires a certain mindset and a game plan.
It is more important to me today than ever to accept graciously the detours in my life and recalculate
wisely, intently, and purposefully in order to live a life with style.
A style which comes from within, from the heart and the spirit- a style that is timeless.
Oh, and when those pesky detours coming knocking at our doors, and they eventually find us all,
It is vital to learn how to manage those emotions, thoughts and anxieties.
To let go of the familiar, the comfortable, the journey which we had so carefully planned
and embark on the new route.
As I look back on my life, and as I look to the future, as I look into the eyes and hearts of my
dearest of dears-my children-and mostly centering in on my daughters.
(Because you do know, that women think, feel and hear different than men.)
I would want my daughters, the ones I gave birth to and those which I lovingly acquired from my
husband I would want them to know this.
Life is filled with detours, many of them hurt-badly.
They make our hearts ache and our heads spin.
Sometimes we want to run, but if we must run, run with intent and Run With Passion.
Emotions and thoughts are part of the process of detours, but recalculate, knowing that
what you are thinking and feeling are just that-they do not define you.
Embrace your Faith, your connection to your Heavenly Father will comfort and guide you.
Seek comfort from those who love you.
Your previous journey has not been a waste, it has been a tool to prepare you for this detour.
Take these tools, add them to your handbook of life, punch the new destination in your
personal GPS of life and truly know that All of this is part of the remarkable journey of living.
Of Aging, at any age, with Style.
If you have a moment, please share how you have managed the detours in your life.
xoxox
Dear Jemma,
ReplyDeleteI've been wanting to comment on several of your amazing posts recently, but time has not allowed me to, as I've been up to my knees in boxes, packing and organizing - for TWO households; my sister's and my daughter's! BUT, your post today demanded my time, first to read, and then to say a few words to you, since it talks about EXACTLY what I, myself, have been experiencing in my own life lately.
You have so eloquently and sensitively communicated what I am sure many of us are feeling. And you're absolutely right: it is better to accept that some things about our comfort zones will change, and anticipate new and different ones with grace and gratitude.
Wishing you a wonderful weekend, full of feel-good detours, like lingering smiles from your girls, sweet chats with old friends, and nourishing naps under sunny skies.
Love to you,
Poppy
Dear Poppy,
DeleteI knew you were busy, but I do not believe I realized that you were packing up TWO households!
Goodness, many changes, new roads to travel, filled with opportunities and new experiences.
I am sending you and the family wishes for the very, very best.
With love,
Jemma
Jemma, this is a lovely and wise post, and it is a healthy post because I've read so much lately about how important it is to adapt and accept the new reality, if it's not something you should or can change. It seems that the happiest people, according to the research I've read, are those that are able to do it with the wisdom you've written about here. That's certainly good enough reason to not become an old hidebound grouch when our life throws us a curve ball.
ReplyDeleteIt's not easy, my bent is to fight change, look to the past and want my comfort zone, but I do recognize the dangers of that mindset now and am trying to face the future and give thanks for it, no matter the circumstances.
Bless you!
Dewena
Oh Dewena,
DeleteI am wired very similiar to you, I tend to long for the past and naturally because the past is a memory, it is undoubtedly much rosier than it truly was. We are all works in progress, aren't we- and sometimes these "oh I get it," moments come at the strangest times.
As women who strive to age with style we will remain positive and we will forge ahead!
Life throws all kinds of curve balls at us.. I've learned to just flow with it as fighting it usually doesn't help much. We'll be driving through Oklahoma next month.. I hope the rain stops! ((hugs)), Teresa :-)
ReplyDeleteTeresa,
DeleteWhat a savvy woman you are. Rebelling against what is or isn't seems to waste so much energy, when we could be putting those forces to work on healthier areas of our lives.
The rain that we just had was from the tropical storm from the Yucatan Peninsula-I feel certain that by the time you journey this direction we shall be hot and dry.
Wishing you a safe and pleasant trip!
Hugs,
Jemma
Hello Jemma, I had to laugh over the GPS comment about recalculating. That happens to me and my GPS all the time. Aging is something we can not stop but it would be nice to slow it down. Life does have a lot of ups and downs, like a roller coaster. I come to accept the whatever is thrown at me lol. Lovely post and advice, enjoy your weekend!
ReplyDeleteHi Eileen,
DeleteLOL!! Those GPS systems-they just seem to have a mind of their own;) I am glad I am not the only one, who has to get into a tiff with one!
Acceptance-such a beautiful way to live life...
Happy Weekend to you too!
Jemma - I haven't told you of my new detour yet. I have gone full circle - oh many times in my life as you know - but literally this past year.
ReplyDeleteOne year ago I had cancer. We knew we were going to sell the house. Well I packed what I could before surgery to be ready when the house sold. We put the house up for sale in July - not one look. Took it off for the holidays. Then we decided to put it up again in March - daughter to get married - she moves out. We have 36 different people look at the house. A couple of low ball offers we said no to. Okay so daughter moves out and guess what - we moved her back in today and have taken house off the market. LOL How is that for full circle. Now I am unpacking to stay. The whole last year and ended up in the same place.
I do love what you wrote today and it is so true - life does throw a curve ball and we have to adapt or die! teehee
Sandi,
DeleteI did not know about your recent detour! It has been quite a year hasn't it? You could or should write a book on the subject! You sound good though, I am thankful that you are in a good place now and that by riding the storm out your are right where you should be.
Jemma,
ReplyDeleteWhat a fantastic post and so true! I am currently preparing for a major life change and just did a pot on it! Stop by if you have a chance....
Hugs,
Deb
Hey Debbie,
DeleteOh, I am heading over to you right now! Us aging with style girls and embracing the changes that life has for us- must stick together!
Hugs,
Jemma
I think we all experience stumbling blocks in our lives - detours. We have to be strong to endure these things. Aging does take it's toll, but we always manage. I have had my fair share of detours. I have had three cancers.....surgeries, chemo , plus radiation. I am very thankful to have a very loving and supportive husband. yes, men and women think and feel differently. We shall all prevail. It makes us stronger. I know you are loving your new design..... xo
ReplyDeleteHello Sweet Lady!
DeleteYou have endured much and we have surviving cancer as a common bond, I did not have to go through it three times, though. You have a strong and can do spirit that has guided you beautifully. I am thankful that you are well now:)
Loving my blog-how about totally, completely and utterly fascinated with it!
You are very talented blog designer and I thank you!!
xo
Detours for me mean I have walked right up into something and that is how I know to turn around. Detours for me are driving and trying to figure out where I'm going with something akin to common sense. When my brain is not wired with common sense.
ReplyDeleteBrenda
Brenda,
DeleteIt seems we all have different detours (road blocks, hurdles) to get through and we all have our own internal GPS system. Sometimes it just takes awhile for it to kick in. The positive news is that we all keep trying.
What a beautiful post Jemma. Life gives us so many detours, but holding onto God's hand we need never be scared. That's really how I've handled every detour up to know, prayer. At times aging gracefully is a challenge, though, isn't it? We still want to do everything we've always done, stay up late, go go go all day. Hope you are having a beautiful weekend! Lidy
ReplyDeleteLIdy,
DeleteIt is so very nice to meet you and thank you for visiting today, and taking the time to share your thoughts on how you handle the roadblocks in your life and the strength of your faith!
Have a lovely weekend as well,
Jemma
Hi Jemma,
ReplyDeleteI have so missed this conversation! I feel like the "curve balls" have been relentless lately. So, are you saying that running is not an option?
I'm joking of course and everything you said so eloquently makes such good sense. Sometimes I just need to hear the wisdom of someone else who is going through the same things at the same time. There is such comfort in knowing that I'm not alone.
A wonderful post Jemma and so timely for me! Thank you!
Hugs,
Linda
Good Morning Linda!
DeleteLol! Running...I have tried, unfortunately I just kept running into the same road block...
Oh, I absolutely agree with you that having a support system makes all of the difference in coping.
The longer I live the more I realize that as a collective group of women we need to stay in touch and empower one another through the trials of life.
Thank you for stopping by, it is always a pleasure to hear from you!
xo
Jemma
Jemma, you are a GEM. First of all, I am so glad we found each other by the detour of INSTAGRAM; I started that path only to share my holiday with one friend from blogging, and I ended up in an unexpected and very pleasant journey, and you are a part of it.
ReplyDeleteI am very impressed by your prose here; it made me think of the detours that the world puts on our path of aging gracefully, like for example, the many promises of holding back the tides of CHANGE. There are certainly things we can learn to do to make our aging more graceful and even more PLEASURABLE, and to help us live our days in better health both mentally and physically. But I so agree with you. We need to make sure we are firmly rooted in the map we have been given, the map that leads us to TRUTH. No facial cream or diet can make us live longer or look like we did when we were 20! Those detours only take us to a circle of disappointment, where we can never get off. Detours are wonderful when they lead us to happiness in finding that we have a connection, in finding nature's beauty, in finding OUR potential in the Heavenly Father's will.....
May all your detours lead you to such a place. ME TOO!
Big hugs to you dearest Jemma, and have a great Father's Day celebration! Anita
Sweet Anita,
DeleteI too am delighted that we have found one another on Instagram! What a joy our journey has been and I am always inspired by your photos and comments.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts today and where you receive the strength to navigate through life and it's many detours.
Have a beautiful day!
I love your analogy with our aging lives and the annoying GPS girl!! I too can totally relate to your post that was so perfectly written and touched my soul. I look in the mirror and realize that I can't do anything about the aging face or body (within my budget anyways!!) and that I have to keep my head on straight and not stress over it. Honestly, without my heavenly Father to cry to, I don't know how I'd handle it all. He also assures me that I am exactly where he wants me and I am experiencing the things He wants me to at this very moment in my life. I have a wonderful husband, children, grandchildren and friends. I choose to live each day as it comes.
ReplyDeleteLOL! I am just happy to know that I am not alone with my love/hate relationship with my GPS!
DeleteThank you for sharing your faith with us today and the comfort you receive from our Heavenly Father.
Thinking about and wishing for some of the things of our past seems to be almost a national past time, especially amongst us boomers. We miss the sound of the Good Humor truck on a summer's night, catching fireflies, playing tag and hide n seek, all while watching our children and grandchildren emmersed in their phones. No wonder we feel the way we do! Change is good, and fighting it just brings frustration and disappointment, but sometimes we need to stand up and say 'enough'. Detours are also good, as long as there isn't a cliff at the end of the road.
ReplyDeleteAs for aging, I'm opting out of that if you don't mind.
Now you'll have to excuse me while I go put on my thong bikini and strut my stuff ;).
Good point, Doreen-our generation pretty much lived in a Norman Rockwell painting-didn't we?
DeleteI am glad you are opting our of aging-may I join you:)
I'm joining the both of you ;)
DeleteI miss all the things that Doreen mentioned. That was all still alive during my generation too. I spend a lot of time fighting progress, but sometimes you have to give in.
As far as roadblocks in life, I pray for guidance. It may look at times like it's not going to go well, but usually all the pain and suffering was for something better than I could have ever imagined.
xoxo,
rue
Hi Jemma. Enjoyed this post. Oh yeah, I've experienced many, many detours in life. I think the way I've handled most of them is to do what you suggested-----focus on the Lord and keep telling myself that He is in control, He is in charge and He's the boss. I've weathered all of the immense changes as well as the little ones. I imagine there will be many more ahead. He will be there with me, and with you, too! Susan
ReplyDeleteWell said, Jemma. Aging is not always fun, nor are the life changes that come along with it. We must be flexible with all of the detours!
ReplyDeleteHi Jemma, This is a lovely post and such a blessing for me tonight to read. Yes, life has many detours in our path which causes us to make changes to reach the end result. So many times I have had to redirect my sails with God's help and direction. I believe now, it's those detours that give us courage strength and make us who we are. Thank you for sharing and blessing me.
ReplyDeleteHave a great week ahead. Hugs, cm
So true! And expressed with such empathy and acceptance.
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful post Jemma and obviously written straight from the heart. This ageing thing came quickly and after a little detour this year I found myself stunned with the reality of it. I've written a couple of posts about ageing (mostly humorous) but at times it really isn't funny at all is it? God's Word is what offers me encouragement as I read that He is not finished with us until Jesus comes again (I Peter 5:4).
ReplyDeleteBlessings to you dear one,
Patti
What a wonderful post Jemma and obviously written straight from the heart. This ageing thing came quickly and after a little detour this year I found myself stunned with the reality of it. I've written a couple of posts about ageing (mostly humorous) but at times it really isn't funny at all is it? God's Word is what offers me encouragement as I read that He is not finished with us until Jesus comes again (I Peter 5:4).
ReplyDeleteBlessings to you dear one,
Patti